Happy Sabbath, friends!

I will be vulnerable and honest and say that this past week has been quite emotionally stressful for me.

Just know, I am extremely grateful that the Sabbath day is here and that I get this time to fully devote myself to the God of peace. For these sacred hours, I can place the worries of the week into His hands and trust that whatever needs my attention can wait until the Sabbath is over.

My birthday is coming up, and typically, the days leading up to my birthday — and sometimes even the special day itself — can leave me stressed out of my mind because I want everything to be perfect.

My expectations for my birthday have always been high. Maybe part of that comes from growing up believing that birthdays are supposed to be special days when the birthday girl or boy is celebrated, appreciated, and loved.

And there is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to feel those things.

But sometimes, without even realizing it, celebration can turn into expectation.

And expectation can turn into pressure.

When Celebration Becomes A Test

A birthday is ultimately supposed to be a celebration of life, but sometimes we can turn it into a test — a test of whether people show up, whether plans go perfectly, whether we feel loved enough, or whether the day lives up to what we imagined.

But our worth was never meant to be measured by one day.

Maybe I am not the only person who feels this way around their birthday. Or maybe birthdays do not carry this kind of weight for you at all.

But surely, at some point in your life, you have experienced a day or event that meant so much to you that all you wanted was to feel celebrated, appreciated, and loved.

Isn’t that something we all desire at one point or another?

Birthdays are like that for me.

They can carry a lot of expectation. I want everyone to have fun. I want to feel celebrated. And if I am being completely honest, I may quietly use the day to measure who cares about me and who does not.

That is a lot of emotional weight to place on one day.

No birthday can perfectly prove who loves us.

People can disappoint us. Plans can change. Things can go wrong. And even a seemingly “perfect” day can still leave us feeling empty if we are asking it to provide something that only God can truly give us.

Psalm 118:8 (NIV)
“It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in humans.”

Releasing The Perfect Picture

When we continually place all of our trust and expectations in the people around us, disappointment is eventually going to happen.

People are human.

Even the people who genuinely love us will sometimes fall short.

But our Heavenly Father is different.

His faithfulness does not change based on who shows up, what plans fall through, or whether the day unfolds exactly the way we imagined.

He sees us.

He knows us.

He loves us.

And His love is not dependent on whether everything goes according to plan.

Instead of trying to control every detail, maybe we can ask God to help us receive the day for what it is.

Proverbs 16:9 (NIV)
“In their hearts humans plan their course, but the LORD establishes their steps.”

Philippians 4:6–7 (NIV)
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

My human nature wants control over my own life.

I like things to go a certain way. And when they do not, it can stress me out.

Yet God continually calls us to surrender that control and place our complete trust in Him.

That is much easier said than done — especially for people like me.

But God already sees what we cannot.

His way may not look identical to the way we pictured things unfolding, but we can trust that He is still working even when our expectations are not met.

We may not always understand the plan while we are living through it, but we know the character of the One holding it.

Romans 8:28 (NIV)
“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”

One Day Cannot Define A Relationship

My birthday also tends to reveal to me who I believe truly cares about me.

Maybe you have experienced something similar.

And sometimes disappointment really can teach us something about a relationship.

But we should also be careful about allowing one day to become the final verdict on who truly cares about us.

People express love differently.

Circumstances happen.

Someone may disappoint us without intending to.

And one event cannot always tell us the entire story of a relationship.

Believe me, this message is just as much for me as it is for you reading it.

I am a continuous work in progress — we all are.

We are each on our own journey with Christ, and God will continue using His Word, circumstances, people, and experiences to shape us into children who better honor and represent Him.

And throughout that process, we have to remember something important:

Our worth is not determined by how many people show up, how enthusiastic they are, how many messages we receive, or whether someone disappoints us.

Psalm 139:13–18 (NIV)
“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. How precious to me are your thoughts, God! How vast is the sum of them! Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand—when I awake, I am still with you.”

Your life had worth and value before anyone else ever had the opportunity to celebrate it.

A Different Kind Of Celebration

Instead of asking:

Did everyone show up for me?
Did everyone have fun?
Was it perfect?

Maybe we can ask:

What has God done in my life this past year?
How has He carried me?
What am I thankful for?
How do I want to walk with Him in the year ahead?

When we begin asking those questions, a birthday — or whatever special day means the most to us — becomes less about proving something and more about recognizing the gift we have already been given.

Another day.

Another year.

Another opportunity to walk with Jesus.

Psalm 90:12 (NIV)
“Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.”

Something Worth Celebrating

Maybe the goal is not to have the perfect birthday.

Maybe the goal is to enter another year of life knowing that no matter who shows up, what goes according to plan, or what disappoints us, the God who gave us life is still faithful.

So today, I challenge you — and myself — to loosen our grip on the “perfect” picture we have created in our minds.

Instead of trying to control every detail, let us practice placing our complete trust in our Heavenly Father.

Thank Him for the faithfulness He shows us each and every day.

Praise Him for His unconditional love.

Celebrate the fact that our value is not determined by one day, one event, or another person’s ability to meet our expectations.

We already have something far greater to celebrate:

We are known by God.

We are loved by God.

And we have been given another day to walk with Him.

Now that is something worth celebrating.

Psalm 100:4–5 (NIV)
“Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. For the LORD is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations.”

Amen.