Happy Sabbath, friends!
With the month of February coming to an end, this wraps up our focus on Christ-like love. For the final message of February, we are going to delve into a love that has no other options — no competition, no comparison.
In Jesus’ eyes, we are chosen.
He chose us before we ever chose Him. Why, then, should we settle or place ourselves in situations where we are not the first and only choice?
John 15:16 (NIV)
“You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit—fruit that will last—and so that whatever you ask in my name the Father will give you.”
One thing about myself is that I love deeply — so deeply that it can become draining when that love is not reciprocated. I have also placed myself in situations where I was not the first choice. I have been the one doing the chasing — trying to prove that I am worthy of someone’s love.
It is heartbreaking. It is confusing. And if I am being completely raw with you — it is exhausting.
Unfortunately, this cycle happens more often than we like to admit. I am sharing this vulnerably because there may be someone reading this who resonates. Please know, you are not alone.
There is a way out of this cycle. It begins with acknowledging this truth: in Jesus, you are always His first choice.
Even when you feel undeserving of love, He still chooses you. You do not have to prove yourself to Him — He meets you exactly where you are and loves you abundantly.
Romans 5:8 (NIV)
“But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
Luke 15:20 (NIV)
“So he got up and went to his father. “But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him.”
Proverbs 4:23 (NIV)
“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.”
There is a woman mentioned in the Word of God who constantly felt she had to prove herself to win the affections of her husband — her name was Leah.
She was not Jacob’s first choice, nor did she have much say in the position she was placed in. I have found myself in Leah’s shoes before — the difference is that she did not choose that situation, but I have, time and time again.
It never feels good to be in a relationship where you constantly feel the need to prove yourself. A God-given relationship should make you feel chosen and loved — not second, forgotten, or like a burden.
Leah tried to win Jacob’s love by bearing him children, hoping that what she produced would finally make her chosen.
Genesis 29:31-35 (NIV)
“When the Lord saw that Leah was not loved, he enabled her to conceive, but Rachel remained childless. Leah became pregnant and gave birth to a son. She named him Reuben, for she said, “It is because the Lord has seen my misery. Surely my husband will love me now.” She conceived again, and when she gave birth to a son she said, “Because the Lord heard that I am not loved, he gave me this one too.” So she named him Simeon. Again she conceived, and when she gave birth to a son she said, “Now at last my husband will become attached to me, because I have borne him three sons.” So he was named Levi. She conceived again, and when she gave birth to a son she said, “This time I will praise the Lord.” So she named him Judah. Then she stopped having children.”
We see the progression clearly:
- Genesis 29:31 — The Lord sees that Leah is unloved and opens her womb.
- Genesis 29:32 — She bears Reuben: “The Lord has seen my misery.”
- Genesis 29:33 — She bears Simeon: “The Lord heard that I am not loved.”
- Genesis 29:34 — She bears Levi: “Now this time my husband will become attached to me.”
- Genesis 29:35 — She bears Judah: “Now I will praise the Lord.”
For the first three sons, Leah is still longing for Jacob’s love. She is still hoping that if she gives enough, produces enough, proves enough — she will finally be chosen.
But by the fourth son, something shifts.
She stops striving for Jacob’s affection and starts praising the Lord.
And here is what makes this even more beautiful — Judah, the son born after she surrendered striving, becomes part of the lineage through which Jesus Christ comes.
The Messiah came through the woman who was not chosen first by her husband — but was fully seen and chosen by God.
If you have ever felt unseen, unloved, or second — there is hope in Leah’s story.
Now contrast that with Ruth.
Ruth’s story gives us a glimpse of covenant love — love without competition.
The moment Boaz notices her, he asks about her.
Ruth 2:5 (NIV)
“Boaz asked the overseer of his harvesters, “Who does that young woman belong to?””
He does not ignore her. He inquires. He sees.
Then he speaks directly to her and makes his intentions protective and clear.
Ruth 2:8-12 (NIV)
“So Boaz said to Ruth, “My daughter, listen to me. Don’t go and glean in another field and don’t go away from here. Stay here with the women who work for me. Watch the field where the men are harvesting, and follow along after the women. I have told the men not to lay a hand on you. And whenever you are thirsty, go and get a drink from the water jars the men have filled.” At this, she bowed down with her face to the ground. She asked him, “Why have I found such favor in your eyes that you notice me—a foreigner?” Boaz replied, “I’ve been told all about what you have done for your mother-in-law since the death of your husband—how you left your father and mother and your homeland and came to live with a people you did not know before. May the Lord repay you for what you have done. May you be richly rewarded by the Lord, the God of Israel, under whose wings you have come to take refuge.””
He tells her to remain in his field. He ensures her safety. He affirms her character. He blesses her faithfulness.
And eventually, he publicly chooses her.
Ruth 4:9-10 (NIV)
“Then Boaz announced to the elders and all the people, “Today you are witnesses that I have bought from Naomi all the property of Elimelek, Kilion and Mahlon. I have also acquired Ruth the Moabite, Mahlon’s widow, as my wife, in order to maintain the name of the dead with his property, so that his name will not disappear from among his family or from his hometown. Today you are witnesses!””
There is no confusion. No hidden intentions. No emotional ambiguity.
Ruth never had to compete. She never had to chase. She never had to prove her worth.
Boaz chose her — intentionally, clearly, and publicly.
And his love was not merely spoken — it was demonstrated.
1 John 3:18 (NIV)
“Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth.”
This is the type of love we should allow into our lives. A Christ-like love does not create confusion, comparison, or competition. It is intentional. It is protective. It is clear.
Leah teaches us that striving for human affection will never satisfy the way resting in God’s love will.
Ruth shows us that when love is from God, it is secure and visible — shown through both words and actions.
We should not settle for a Jacob when there is a Boaz in the waiting.
A Christ-like love will never make you feel unseen, unloved, or not chosen. It will make you feel secure — because you are secure in Christ first.
You are a child of the Almighty God.
He loves you in your lowest valleys and your highest victories. He loves you in moments when you feel undeserving. His love is not based on your performance — it is rooted in His character.
If you find yourself in a situation where you are not being seen, loved, or chosen — you have the free will to step away and choose better. You were never created to compete for covenant love.
You were created to be chosen without competition.
We can rest in this truth: no matter what happens, Jesus’ love for you will always prevail and remain constant.
Romans 8:38-39 (NIV)
“For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”
Amen.
Saved By His Grace 
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